Eulogy For Lolo's Last Day

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February 26^th, 2016,

I wrote.

Dear Journal,

Lolo Elmer suddenly cried this afternoon. He cried and said that in a vision, he saw Lola Puri who was kind of asking him to come with her. Thus, he said that he has a really bad stomachache and that he can’t urinate properly. Please tell me that in a way, he isn’t fulfilling his word last week ( a day before his birthday) wherein he told me that since he is already 66 years old, his time is already up and that he has to leave us soon.

March 22^nd, 2016

I tweeted,

I just heard a bad news. Na-ICU si Lolo. Praying for his fast recovery. Lord, please tabangi si lolo.

April 12^th, 2016

I wrote, Lolo is no longer with us. I’ll miss him so much.

I’ll miss him so much. I mean, who wouldn’t miss the presence of a man who was so loving, caring, and portrayed a huge role in your life? Lolo had an important role in my life. Since I was in Kindergarten until the last days of Grade 7, he fetches me every day from school and we often head straight to the mall because I need to buy some things for school. Actually, he really hates it when we go to National Book Store because he ends up paying for all the things that I want to buy. So, we still need to argue before he would purchase the things for me. That is the type of bonding that we have as grandfather and grandkid, arguing.

But, it was not the type of argument that would lead to future fights and scolding because when we have a sincere talk while he is driving, I often say sorry to him for being sometimes being disrespectful and I tell him how much I really love him.

In one of those heartfelt talks, he said that if you really love your family, then you should do all the sacrifices that should be done. He told me how much he loved basketball back in the days and how successful or well known he was in terms of sports. He was a star player and he always goes to the different parts of the region just to play basketball. Despite all of these, he said that one should not just be great on a specific game or sports, but one should also be great in dealing with life problems or the problems in the real world. So, for the sake of earning money for his family, he gave up basketball, but he then took note that it was something that he did not regret because after all, family should go first.

Yes. He was a person who really loved his family. When I was a little kid, he used to take care of me so well most especially because I was born with Spina Bifida and I underwent an operation when I was just two days old. I needed extra care since there was a possibility that I could not walk at all. And Lolo gave me extra care. In fact, he was actually one of the people who were hands on in teaching me how to walk. And whenever I tumble accidentally, he would really scold my yaya as if it were her fault.

Given with my condition and being an only child, I did not have a lot of friends my age. So, Lolo used to play with me. We were playing as if we were having tea with Disney Princesses like Ariel, Cinderella, and Belle and for a long time, pretended that they were always visiting me whenever I am sleeping. Just recently, we tried to recall the characters in Nickelodeon’s Backyardigans and I was surprised because Lolo could still remember all the characters, but I could only remember the female ones.

I would say that Lolo and I were so close. In 2008, he stopped smoking and drinking liquor because of my big mouth. Whenever I see him smoking or I can smell that he is drunk, I would immediately scold him as if I were a police or a person in authority. Well, since he can’t stop my big mouth from talking and complaining these things to Wawa, Mami, or Aa, he just stopped his bad habits.

Ohh. Those memories… I can’t believe that I made a ton of them with Lolo. I has only been a few days since we lost lolo, yet I already miss him so much. I wonder, “how can I surpass a year or two without crying for this loss?’

To end this, I just want to say that I'll miss my Lolo so much and that I wish that I did not argue with him that much.

"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take"

P.S. This is my last post about Lolo's death.

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Anya

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